Self-Trust Revolution: Breaking Through Life-Scripts To Your Confident Life

Today, we’re going to talk about something that often gets in the way of living an intentional life. 

Life-Scripts.

Life-scripts are the scripts we’ve been handed for our performance in life. Often without our conscious awareness, they instruct us on how we should live, love, work, and do life.

Not everyone’s scripts are the same. They are informed by our family of origin, culture, schooling, religion, political messaging, geographic location we live, and the generation we’re born into. 

These scripts tell us what we should (and shouldn’t) do.

Today, we’ll explore why these life-scripts can be so appealing… The biggest reason I’ve seen…

They offer a perceived sense of safety. A promise that if you follow these prescribed paths, you’ll be happy! And you don’t have to think much about it. You can just cruise on auto-pilot to a life of ease and contentment. They also allow you to outsource your decisions. And when you do that, you don’t have to take accountability for your own choices. That can be pretty tempting when Self-Trust is lacking. 

But then, you wake up one day, unsure how you got where you are. You’ve been on auto-pilot for so long and haven’t been present. You’ve been a passenger in your own life. 

And, you may have abandoned parts of yourself along the way. 

Have you slowed down long enough to wonder if the scripts you’re following are actually working?

This doesn’t mean that all the scripts you’ve been provided are wrong or bad. Some of these scripts might end up being perfect for you. The key factor here is intentionality. Taking time to actually get curious if the scripts are working for you. 

Maybe your life will end up looking exactly like the original scripts you were given. 

And then again, maybe it won’t. 

Either way though, intentionally choosing a path feels a whole lot different. You’ll know WHY you chose it. And you’ll be an active participant in your own life.

This is what living an intentional life is all about. 

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Are any of these scripts from society familiar to you?

• Get on the “Relationship Escalator” and don’t get off until you’re married (in a monogamous relationship to someone of the opposite sex) with 2 kids.

• “Settle down” and live in one place.

• Follow the “gender roles”.

• Be a “productive member of society”.

• Get the job and work hard to build up a 401k so you can retire at 65.

• Subscribe to “hustle culture” and work really hard.

• Or more recently… Reject “hustle culture” and learn to rest.

Or what about these messages handed down from family?

• Graduate high school and go directly to college.

• Make sure you can financially support yourself. Don’t rely on a man! 

• Don’t make other people uncomfortable by talking about your feelings. (Or whatever the elephant in the room is.) Bottle everything up! 

• Resting is lazy. 

• It’s weak to ask for help. 

These scripts also want to tell you exactly how you “should” handle transitions in life. They instruct you how you’re supposed to think, feel, and act when you’re going through a divorce. After you have a baby. When someone you love dies. When you change jobs. 

It’s the instruction manual you didn’t ask for. 

These scripts can be sneaky too. Infiltrating your life without realizing it. Telling you what foods to eat to be a “good person”. How you should feel about your body and sexuality. Constantly instructing you to defer to experts outside of yourself. Even when your body is screaming something different. 

This is why you can’t live an intentional life AND on auto-pilot. You don’t get both. 

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A common response when we realize something isn’t working, is to swing in the complete opposite direction. Anybody else got that rebellious teenager part inside? 

Imagine a pendulum swinging back and forth. 

Between the extremes. All or nothing. Black or white. 

We’re trying to find balance in our system. But it’s not working. 

Unconsciously following the life-scripts you were handed isn’t choice. 

But doing the “opposite” of the life-script in an act of rebellion isn’t choice either. 

It all comes back to choosing with intention. 

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Want to go deeper?

Get your free Self-Trust map to begin your personal journey!

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If you’re ready do join other women going from good to great, sign up for the next round of Epic Self-Trust.